Oh my goodness, I am tired.  I'm not sure why.  I slept like a baby last night.  I mean, I was dead to the world.  It was wonderful   I think last night was the first night in a long time that I've actually gotten a descent night's sleep.  I think I'm tired because I had to get up early this morning for church.

Anyway, yesterday, I had to work and I completely forgot that I was supposed to.  I work every other weekend and every 3rd Sunday.  Today was not my Sunday to work so I thought I didn't have to work on Saturday (sounds confusing, I'm sure, but my schedule is kinda' confusing as well).  I got a call from my manager telling me I was supposed to be in at noon.  I wound up being 15 minutes late.  Thankfully, my work is less than 5 minutes away.  I dress and all that jazz so I just put on my shoes and left.  I felt so bad though.  I'm never late.  When I got there, my manager said to me, "You're late....you're never late."  I apologized to her and told her it wouldn't happen again.  It won't either because if it's one thing I hate, it's being late for work.

After work, I met up with a couple of friends of mine from church, Nickie and Matt (who are engaged).  They called me and told me they were at a pizza place with someone I hadn't seen in over a year.  It was Steve (and Bekah, if you're reading this, yes, it was Hartman).  It was so trippy seeing him.  It was nice seeing him, but it was weird.  He hasn't seemed to have changed much.  Still seems like the same Steve I knew when I was 15.  He looks older and a little fatter.  He's got a little belly (which I thought was funny).  He used to be a twig.  He's really filled out.  He's dating a girl from church and I guess he's working 2 or 3 jobs and living with Matt (he kinda' screwed himself over with a living situation and had nowhere to go so Matt took him in).  He kept hugging me and putting his arm around me which was kinda' weird cuz' he's got a GF....well, not really.  He used to do that when he was with Sarah.  I kinda' wonder how he's treating his GF with knowing his past (he wasn't the most faithful guy in the world).  She's away at college.  I just hope he's behaving himself.  It was good seeing him though....sure brought back a lot of memories *tear*

The whole point of me meeting up with Smitty (Matt) and Nickie was, well, to visit them for one.  I hadn't seen either one of them in a while and I also wanted to talk to them about a lot of stuff that has been going on in my life.  It was kinda' funny because Nickie had gotten up to go get more pizza (it was an all-you-can-eat place) and Matt came and sat next to me.  He asked me what was going on and I just started to cry.  I felt so bad for getting all emotional on him.  I don't think he's ever seen me cry for the past 8 or 9 years that he's known me.  He put his arm around me to try to comfort me, but I seemed to cry even more. Nickie came back to the table, noticed me crying and says to Matt, "What'd you do!!??"  Smitty immediately says, "It wasn't me...I swear."  We all started laughing.  It was pretty funny.  So, after I regained my composure, I spilled my guts to them about everything.  Everything that I had been keeping inside and I normally don't do that.  I would've talked to my parents, but I chose not to.  I needed a good friend to talk to so I chose Nickie and Smitty.  I really needed some godly insight from them and they gave it to me.  My gosh, I felt so much better afterwards.  They gave me so much encouragement, words of advice, etc.  I don't know what I would've done without them (Matt said I would've probably ended up in a psych. ward, lol).  I love those guys so much.  Everyone should have friends like those two.  So, needless to say, after last night, I just felt so free.  I felt like I had a 50 ton weight lifted off my shoulders.  Everything that had been going on had really been weighing me down.  I knew I had to talk to someone because it was really having an effect on me.

I saw Smitty this morning at church.  He hugged me and asked how I was feeling.  My responce was, "So much better...a lot better."  I'm supposed to be going to lunch with Nickie and Smitty here in a little bit.  I'm just waiting on the phone call.  Anyway, I think that's all I have to say for now.  I leave you with some images of my cute lil' boy, Chico with his stuffed duck (or Mr. Quackers as my parents call him, lol).  It's so funny seeing him carry it around in his mouth.  He's a cutie.  Anyway, more coming later....

Just wanted to update before I head off to work.  I am so tired, I don't even wanna go to work.  I kinda' have a headache.  It's probably from my lack of sleep for the past 2 nights.  I'm not sure why I haven't been sleeping well.  I suppose it could be from stress or maybe I'm slightly depressed.  I have moments like that from time to time.  Perhaps it's a combination of stress and depression.  I don't know.

I've got a bunch of homework to do.  I've started part of it.  Most of it is reading.  I have to write responces to what I've read.  I'm kinda' worried about it though.  I have to send it to my professor and the last thing I sent to him, I formatted incorrectly.  I'm not even sure how to format my papers the way we're supposed to.  This class seems more difficult than what I thought it would be.  I wasn't worried about it in the begining (ha, I say that like I've been in class for a month already.  I'm only in my 2nd week), but now I kinda' am.  I know I'll have to work my butt off, but I just hope it pays off.

Valentine's Day is coming up, as I'm sure you all know, whether you have a Valentine or not.  I am one of those who doesn't have a valentine.  All the girls at work are excited about it.  They're all making plans with their BF's.  I have nothing to look forward to.  Valentine's Day will be just another day.  It always has been.  I used to get excited about it at one point in time.  I don't even know why.  I've never had anything to get excited about.  I'm begining to think Valentine's Day is overrated.  People make a bigger deal out of it than it actually is.

In other news, I went and checked out a school in the southeastern part of the state yesterday.  My dad made the trip with me and I'm greatful because he knew the area better than I did.  Anyway, I might be moving to this area to attend the school there (sorry for beating around the bush, just don't feel like adding details).  It won't be happening anytime soon.  I wish it was though.  I need to relocate.  There is nothing here where I'm at.  The only thing I have here is family.  I'm hoping to have a new start there.....make some friends and what not.  It's kinda' is a ghetto-ish spot though.  Well, this is where I cut this off because I've gotta get going to work.  I'll write more later....

I don't have much to say tonight.  Been real emotional lately.  Been from one extreme to another.  Really happy one minute, depressed the next.  Ooooooh, gotta love being a girl who's on her rag.  Yes, I realize that was probably too much information, but oh well.  It's a part of being a girl so THERE!!!! 

As usual, there's nothing exciting going on with me.  Everyone at work is talking about how they're excited about Valentine's Day (I work with mostly girls who have bf's).  It's kinda' depressing.  I would love to celebrate and talk about being excited as well, but unfortunately, Valentine's Day will be just another day.  I keep thinking that things could change between now and Valentine's Day, but it won't.  Don't know what I'm thinkin'.  Eh, anyway, I've gotta go.  Gotta get up early in the morning to go to class.  G'night.

So yesterday, I had my first class.  It was a writing class.  I happen to be taking it with Bekah and Kathryn's father.  Part of the class is in a class room for two hours and the other two hours is to be done online.  The course seems like it should be farely easy, but the online stuff kinda' threw me a little bit.  Probably because I had never taken a class that was partially online.  I think once I check stuff out and what not, it shouldn't take long for me to catch on.  I think I'll like this class.  The only thing I don't like is having to get to class by ten in the morning.  Now I know why I take night classes....so I don't have to get up in the morning.  What was weird about the morning was, on my way home, I spotted a guy that looked like Matt.  I don't think it was him.  I'm almost 100 percent positive it wasn't him.

I'm also taking a course in Criminal Justice.  When I got there, I spotted Matt's truck.  I knew he was there, but I wasn't expecting to run into him or anything.  That was actually the last thing I had on my mind.  I had to figure out where my class was because I couldn't remember.  I asked some lady who was working information.  She was a little rude, but she pointed me in the right direction so I didn't care so much.  On my way to find my class, I heard someone yell out my name.  I turned to look to see who it was and it was Matt.  He asked me how I was doing and what not.  Truthfully, I didn't do much talking because I wasn't feeling well.  I really didn't know what to say to him.  He had to get going and gave me a little side hug.  It was kinda' weird because last time I saw him, he never hugged me.  *sigh* I don't know what to think about that boy.  He was with girls....well, they were getting something to eat.  They're probably one of his several girlfriends.  *shrugs* I don't know.  The cool thing about my CJ class is there's a guy I know from high school in it.  I happened to graduate with him.  He's a cool guy.  It was nice to catch up with him.  I don't think I've seen him since we graduated.  So, that was my "first week".  Perhaps I'll update more through the semester.  Later ya'll... 

Hey all,

What's up??  Not a whole lot here.  I'm off to bed in a minute, but I thought I'd write in my blog really quick.  Classes start tomorrow.  It should be interesting.  I'm not looking forward to getting up early in the morning, but I think I'll live.  It's a two hour class so it shouldn't be that bad.  My other class is 3 hours.  Eh, I'll live.  Okay, that's all for now.  I'll update after the first day of classes are over.  G'night ya'll...